The Test

I feel like I am being tested. Not only can I not run now, but I need to mostly stay off of my feet. I need to get creative with how to lose that last pound before Tuesday. I didn't do great last night because, well, Nate was trying to make me feel better and bought Chinese. It's hard to explain to people that although that does make me feel better in a way, it's not what I need. I made good decisions about portion, the best decisions you can make about Chinese food. I ate only a little of the pork fried rice and I ordered chicken with vegetables. But there were spring rolls and sweet and sour chicken! Can you really not have any? I couldn't help myself. And then to top it all off Nate pulls out these Tollhouse chocolate chip ice cream cookies. I looked at the wrapper and there are 490 calories in there! Holy Shit! I did one of the hardest things I've ever done. I ate half and put the other half out of sight in the freezer. But I certainly hurt my chances of reaching my goal this week. I am a little sore from Thursday's DVD video workout which is good because I didn't feel like it was all that much of a workout. I need to make a list of things that don't involve my toes.
I can do:
Situps
Pushups (girly style, off the toes)
Squats
Modified Yoga
Modified Pilates
Swimming (just using arms)
Most kickboxing moves without contact
Don't have a gym membership right now so the other things that would work like stationary bike I don't have access to. Any other ideas?

Oh. Ate well today. Regular eggs for breakfast and then I had apples and peanut butter for lunch. I'm going to do a modified workout when I'm done with this post. I'll keep in mind that no matter what workout I do, it can't be as boring as Myia's 10 mile tread-mill walk. That should keep me going.

Oh Great Sadness

Well, I was going to go to my kickboxing class tonight even though my toe is broke. I thought better of it about 10 minutes before I normally leave. I needed to do something so that the scale dips to 140 on Tuesday. I pulled out some old workout DVDs. I did the kickboxing part of the "10 Minute Solutions" and then did what was supposed to be a Pilates workout. I thought it was going to be an hour, but it was only a half hour. So I went into my bedroom afterwards and did some shadowboxing, situps and pushups. I'm glad I didn't go to the class tonight, since while I was shadowboxing my toe did start to hurt a little worse again. At least I could decide what moves to do and didn't put too much pressure on it. I feel like I did an okay workout.

The worse part of tonight is that I had a pre-workout snack and ate pasta for dinner to prepare for the class. I usually eat a little more because I know I'm going to the class. I don't feel like the DVDs were anywhere near as good of a workout. I'm going to have to do another video tomorrow.

Nate just mentioned Cold Stone Creamery. Man, what a jerk. I love Cold Stone. I told him I would drive him there, but I wasn't getting anything.

I'm just going to keep thinking about the nice abs I'm going to have in a few weeks.

Feeling Thin

It's nice when you're able to stick to a healthy diet, at least for a few days. Whether or not the scale is moving or not I won't know until Tuesday, but I feel better. My pants also feel better.
The other day Nate and I went for a 50 minute walk on the beach. It was awesome. I think he actually came along for the workout, not just to get Gizmo and Titus out of the house. I let him decide when we turned around and it was pretty far down the beach before he wanted to go back. It was a little scary because it has been very windy recently and there were some kite surfers who obviously didn't know what they were doing. The scary part occurs when a kite surfer comes to the wrong part of the shore and doesn't know how to get his huge kite out of the sky gently. Have you ever seen a regular kite dive bomb to the ground? That's what it was like, but with huge 8 foot span kites. We had to stop and wait several times for these people to ground their kites so we didn't get killed. And then we would run past them just in case they lost control of their kite again. There was one time that the kite surfer came flying towards the shore, his kite came flying towards us and then he was able to change directions last minute and head back out to open sea. Almost stopped my heart. It certainly made the walk more interesting.
Unfortunately I also seem to have broken my toe this week. I walked towards the bathroom to help Nate bathe the dogs after our nice, long walk and I stubbed my pinkie toe on a table leg. I've done this before, and experienced great pain, but this time I actually heard a small snapping noise. I wasn't sure if I had just imagined this or not, but then my toe swelled up and today it is really black and blue. I've had it taped to the toe next to it, which is what the doctor would do if he diagnosed it as broken. They don't usually do much else, unless it looks like it needs to be reset. It doesn't, I can move it, it just hurts like hell.
My big decision is whether I should go to kickboxing tonight. Here I am, into week 2 of my no drinking/healthy eating/not weighing myself until Tuesday plan and I might not be able to work out. I can't go tomorrow, they don't have classes on Friday. I think I can tape up my toe and the front of my foot to stabilize it and then not do any kicking that involves that part of my foot. Usually you kick with your shins. I would almost rather agitate it a little more tonight and get a good workout and then skip tennis on Saturday. I can figure out another way to workout this weekend that doesn't involve running around. I might go in and see how it feels and just leave early if it hurts too bad. Like if I can't jump rope. That's the first thing we usually do. I wish I had indoor boxing shoes, you're allowed to wear those and it would help keep the foot stabilized, but alas, I do not own a pair.
Anyway, I'm going to make sure I eat really well for the next couple of days because whether I go to the class tonight or not, I have to limit the amount of walking I do during the day. Translation- less calories burned during my work day.
My plan is going to have to be to eat healthy through Tuesday, drink lots of water, and figure out a seated workout option for the weekend.

Good Week!

So I've decided I like this Tuesday to Tuesday weekly mindset. It made it easier to get through this weekend.
I didn't drink over the weekend either, and it was nice to be able to limit how much food I ate. I made much better choices at Kara and Eli's place over the weekend I think because I was just drinking water.
I weighed myself this morning- a solid 142. That's fine, that's three pounds. This week I actually feel like I can keep it off instead of gaining the three pounds back for next week. We'll see, but I am optimistic.
I didn't even have ice cream last night when Nate had ice cream. I got back from my kickboxing class and I was tired and ice cream sounded great, but I knew I had just worked really hard, so I said no. I did take a taste of his ice cream and that was enough. I didn't even feel like I was missing out.
My goal of getting good abs is another really good mindset. It is much easier to picture the hot abs I'm going to have someday soon when I want to eat something unhealthy. It's not as easy to picture "losing weight." So this has been very helpful for me this week. I just say to myself, "abs, abs, abs" and think about whether or not the food in front of me is really worth it. Sometimes it is.
My goal for this week is to walk twice again with my dogs. I will still do my class two times and play tennis Saturday or Sunday. I'm also considering getting a second opinion about my knee from a doctor who is well-versed in sports injuries. Maybe I will be able to run again someday, we'll see.
I will weigh myself again next Tuesday. I'm striving for 140 but it would be great to see a number below. Otherwise I'm going to continue to picture my new, hot abs.

Staying Strong

I'm looking forward to my weight in on Tuesday. I had a freaking great kickboxing class last night. We did over one hundred pushups, not all at once, but in 10 pushup increments. We also did more than 300 sit ups, again, not all at once, but in spurts. In between we were working hard. It was a lot of fun and I was so tired afterwards that my body was shaking. I did stay and stretch afterwards or I knew I would be in some major pain today and tomorrow. I actually feel really good right now. I might get more sore tomorrow, for me it often takes 2 days to kick in, but I'm barely sore at all. I'm proud of myself. I am definitely getting stronger, whether I've lost the weight or not. I was also able to do all three rounds of jump roping (3 minute rounds) without stopping. That is a success for me because jumproping is hard work. Usually after the first two rounds the third round will be really difficult because you get tired and you end up not jumping high enough and tripping up on the rope. Yesterday I was still going strong at the end of round three.
I am ready for the weekend, as a part of my week, rather than the end of it. I have plans for dinner tonight and tomorrow. I am going to wake up tomorrow and make myself breakfast and lunch so I don't start snacking on bad stuff in the morning. I am planning on some tennis in the morning as well.

I read an article, about making sure that you're not starving yourself during the day because otherwise you will overeat at night and ruin all of the work you've done. Remember, starving yourself and depriving yourself does not equal weight loss. We've all tried it and it doesn't work. Make sure you are eating enough throughout the day and eating a reasonable amount for dinner. Somehow we have gotten into this mindset of having three big meals during the day and it's time we break out of that habit. It's so much more fun to be able to eat 6 times a day anyway! I checked my calorie intake for my days and I am eating enough because my snacks are small but I eat often enough. I am not hungry when I go home. I do need to work on making my last meal of the day smaller. That is a tough habit to break- the meat, carbs and veggies all on one big plate. But don't starve yourself during the day to make room for the big meal- you'll just overdo it later.

Day 1

I wrote the other day that I am going to work on getting abs rather than losing weight. Whether or not it's going to work, I'm not 100% sure. There is research that supports phrasing goals in the positive. Like replacing- I will not eat ice cream for dessert at night- with I will eat a banana for dessert at night. It tells you what to do, not what not to do. I think I was on the right track, but maybe a little too vague. Thinking as I'm writing- I may need to change my goal to something like I will do 50 situps every day. Or I will do 20 situps in the morning. Hmmm. Maybe I can change the goal to- I will do one thing every day this week to strengthen my abs. My options are: situps, leg raises, bicycles, plank pose, or jack knives. Of course if I think of something else to do that works on my abs, I will count it.

I like that goal much better. Of course I will not be leaving out the rest of my body, I don't want hot abs and shriveled little arms and fat thighs. But I do think I need to start small and think in the positive.

Also, I've changed my week to go from Tuesday to Tuesday instead of Monday through Sunday. I'm trying to work on not letting the weekend get to me. If the weekend is stuck in the middle of my week rather than the end of it, then I can power through it. Of course, it's only a mental change, I will still be working Monday through Friday.

I didn't work as hard at my kickboxing class last night as I usually do because I was paired off with someone who was new to the class. It is a trade off, sometimes you get a killer workout working with someone who has been in the class for a while and sometimes you are the teacher- you get to show someone else the basics and help them feel like they will get better.
So today I need to do some kind of exercise to make up for the missed workout. I will start with the situps or whatever ab building option I choose for tonight and then maybe I should throw the shoes on and go for a walk. It turns out that walking can be pretty good exercise.

The GAW

So Ananda talked me into the Great Aloha Run again. I hadn't wanted to do the event this year because I've run it every other year and had visions of beating my time from previous years. So not being able to run it this year I thought was going to be very disappointing. I kept thinking that it was going to take so much longer and that I would be bored out of my mind. To my surprise, I think I enjoyed the GAW (Great Aloha Walk as Ananda dubbed it) even more this year because we were able to talk for a while and got a really good workout at the same time. It took us a little under two hours and we did a little over a 14 minute per mile pace for the whole thing. We worked on our speedwalking form and took some pictures. I also didn't hurt as bad after this time as I did the last time and Nate and I were able to go to the beach later in the day.
I just looked up my time. 1:55:14 seconds.
I also looked up my previous times: 2008- 1:18:34, 2007- 1:34:20, 2006- 1:55:42.
Funny, I beat my time for 2006, even though I ran it that year. It was a pretty slow run. I must be in much better shape.
I started my detoxification this weekend. So far, so good. I stepped on the scale this morning and am not going to get on it again until next week Tuesday. I am just going to eat well for a week from today and see where that gets me. Also, I realize that I have been setting goals for losing weight. Again and again and again, the same goals with no results. There must be something going wrong. One of the things you can change when looking at goals is changing the goal to a positive. So, instead of a goal of losing so many pounds in so many days I am going to change my goal to getting abs. I am going to take a picture of my belly now and then I will take a picture of it every week. I'm just thinking as I write. I need to somehow come up with a measurement so I will know if I am making progress. Perhaps my waist measurement?
Maybe if I am reaching for getting something instead of losing, I will be better off. Who knows, I'll let you know how it goes. I'm just tired of talking about losing weight, losing weight, instead of getting healthier, looking more toned, etc. Losing weight is not everything.

It's Not Easy Being Clean (and Sober)

I got to hand it to those AA folks, it's not easy to avoid having a drink when you're out with friends. Wednesday I was exhausted and we went out to dinner at Zia's and it was just so nice to eat way too much pasta and have a glass of wine. No excuses, it was just very easy to forget my commitment. Of course officially I said I would stop drinking after Valentine's Day because I want to have some wine with the Kobe Beef Burgers I bought for Nate. After that I was going to commit to not drinking until March 31, Nate's birthday. That's over a month with no drinking at all. Kind of a nice detox time. Maybe I should do the First Phase or whatever Oprah's diet guy calls it. He cuts out a few things like alcohol and you make a commitment to not eating 2 hours before you go to bed. This will be a good time to try it. There's no holidays coming up after Valentine's for a little while. Anybody have good reccomendations for a detoxifying tea? We drink tea all the time and it would be a great combo to stop drinking alcohol and drink a detox tea instead. I'm actually looking forward to it. I am starting to feel bloated a little bit. The scale hasn't moved, but I don't feel my best. When I'm not eating really well I get tired and stressed out easier. And let me tell you, I've been extremely stressed this week. And then of course the cycle begins begins again cause once I'm stressed I just want to eat crap.
I do have to pat myself on the back for getting up early on Wednesday and taking the dogs for a walk on the beach. They were able to run back and forth and I did just a half hour of walking. The only reason I turned around to go back is that Gizmo and Titus were jumping on me to go back. I wanted to actually keep walking. I think if they build up their ability to walk farther I will be able to do a pretty good workout in a little while. It's beautiful and cool in the morning and the dogs definitely are nice and tired afterwards. I just have to be careful with Gizmo cause he's only 8 months old and you're not supposed to put too much stress on a puppy. I'm not running so I'm not too worried, but I don't want to hurt him. I know I ran too much with Titus before he was old enough. The good thing about it is that I now have three options for working out that I enjoy to make up for the lack of running. Tennis, walking and kickboxing.
I am also thinking, jumping back to the earlier part of this ramble, that during my detox month I should stay away from the scale and just eat right and exercise. Then weight myself at the end. I've heard that's a recommendation. At this point staring at the scale isn't helping me anyway, it's been the same for months, give or take a pound or two. Any recommendations for me? Anyone in on a detoxing challenge perhaps?

A Brand New Day

Every day is a new day. I got a few good ideas from Myia the other day that I'm going to try out. The first was not looking at the weekends necessarily as my challenge. But rather making a commitment to eating well for 8 days. That's actually a fabulous idea that I'm going to try starting today. So that means that I am going to try to eat really well until next week Wednesday. Not that I'm going to then gorge, but it's a different way of looking at things instead of using the weekend as an excuse. I should still wake up on the weekends, make my breakfast and pack lunch.

One of these days I may start counting calories, who knows.

I like the clean and sober count on the blog. It's not that I think I'm never going to have a drink again. But, I like the idea of challenging myself to go longer and longer without. I know that it will be good for me. Drinking is such a terrible diet killer. Not just the calories in the drink, but then the calories I allow myself to consume after I've had a drink. I hope nobody reads this thinking that I am a raging alcoholic. When you are trying to lose weight, rather than just stay at a certain weight, than even one night of drinking sabotages a few days worth of good effort. And it's not that worth it.

I really want to lose a few more pounds before Theresa and Shane's wedding. I still have a $50 gift certificate from Ross because I'm waiting until I get down to 135 to be able to use it. It may be a little while, but it's a nice reward. I should think of a reward for myself when I get to and stay under 140. I've hit 140 many times, but still have been fluctuating between 140 and 145. I need to make a few changes so I can stay under 140. I've started walking more often, even though I didn't like it at first. It's not that bad. And it's something.

This week I have kickboxing tomorrow, and Tennis Saturday morning. I'll take the dogs for a walk Sunday morning like I did this morning, it was nice to be on the beach at sunrise. Then I'm considering walking the Aloha Run on Monday. I will probably do kickboxing on Tuesday night and Thursday night next week.

The Dreaded Plateau

After last weekend I started to do really well with my health goals. I didn't drink, I worked out several times over the week and was overall feeling pretty darn good about myself. However, this weekend we had a barbecue and I thought I'll just have a beer and ended up having several. Which isn't terrible, but when I drink I way overeat. I ended up eating tons of chips and ice cream. Then I decided last night that I needed to have ice cream with cheesecake filling on top of it. Might sound gross, but was totally delicious. I am assuming the short walk with my dogs afterwards did nothing to balance out my calorie intake/use. This week I am not going to drink during the week again, but I know that this coming weekend is valentine's day, so I'm not going to make any promises about not drinking over the weekend. Nate and I do have a pretty healthy menu written down for this next week, so I shouldn't eat too poorly. Again, I need to plan ahead for the weekend. I seem to sabotage myself every Saturday/Sunday so whatever good work I've done over the week is completely negated. I go into every weekend 2 or 3 pounds lighter and start back at square one every Monday. If I could even just get through a few weekends I would be better able to meet my goals. I am thinking that after this coming weekend (valentine's day) then I don't have any special holidays until Nate's birthday on March 31st. That's a little over a month. I am planning on not drinking for that time period. I may even have a count of my "clean and sober" days like they do for AA. If anybody wants to join my support group, I can put up a counter for us on my blog page. We can count our clean and sober days together.