Just a Sewing

Ate pretty good and did a lot of sewing today.  Actually, first I did a lot of watching youtube videos about sewing.  I spent an embarrasing 2 hours watching someone else sew.  But, it was so cool.  Fascinating.  She sewed like I want to sew, no measuring, lots of folding in half, free hand drawing and sewing up the sides.  Today I made two dashiki- I made a blue one out of some scratch material first, to test the pattern.  I made some adjustments and made the one on the right.  Apparently I still need to make some adjustments because the neck hole ended up being HUGE.  I am definitely going to make some more shirts like this, cause it's super comfortable.  Once I get the neckline done it will be fashionable too.  I made the obi belt as well, the pattern I copied was here.  I'm going to make a bunch of these too.  I really like the way it lookes.  And the one in the pic is just scrap material.  I'm gonna whip up some pants with the same maroon material in a few cause I have some left that I haven't used in a while.
Right now, before I throw together some comfy pants, I'm waiting for the wings a friend gave us to cook in the oven.  It sounds and smells like it's going to be delicious.  I made some rice for Nathan to go on the side.  I hope everyone enjoyed their Halloween, I was a Samurai on Friday, but sadly I have no pictures.  I don't know how that happened.  If somebody ends up posting a pic they took, I'll share that outfit as well.  I sewed the whole thing.

Crossfit Makes Me Want to Barf, Or Maybe it's the Alcohol

Keysa and I hit up Crossfit Kailua again this morning.  I was worried it was going to be the same old workouts, but I was wrong.  Very wrong.  Luckily I think when the guy in charge sees people that have been there before he is going to mix it up a little.  That's good and bad news, because today we did Burpees, Thrusters and a run with the damn medicine ball.  They must do the run with the medicine ball to get you to not ever want to do an intro class again.  It's not the run itself or the weight, it's the size of the damn ball.  There is no comfortable way to hold it while you run.  So you shift it from side to side, put it over your head and on your shoulder... Hold it behind your back and two hand it in front of you, it's really just a mess.  I could barely do any thrusters and burpees, maybe cause I'm a wuss or maybe cause of the amount of nasty (delicious) food I ate last night.  Maybe both.  Before we started I had a stomach ache.  While we were exercising, I wanted to vomit.  Afterwards... yeah, still wanted to vomit.  But the thing that's cool is that you're in and out of your workout pretty quick, dead tired, you know you worked out, there is no question about that.  I'm sure it will make me better at Tae Kwon Do, unfortunately I can't afford both.  This is one of those times I really wish I was rich.
I ended up going to Crossfit on an empty stomach this morning, which was a good idea, cause I probably would have barfed.  For lunch I had some of my delicious slow cooked chicken stew.  I really need to practice getting the bones out of it though, cause I thought I did a good job, but I keep finding little pieces.  There's nothing grosser than chomping on a bone in your soup.  Also, today I added some Red Hot hot sauce and Primo Taglio Cheddar Cheese.  Quite delicious.
I also had a chance to Skype with my beautiful sisters, Anna and Arin and Arin's fiance Andrea.  And their dogs.  And took my dogs to the vet for their "pedicures" (read- nails trimmed and anal glands expressed) and bathed 'em.  Good day so far.

Stress is Strong!

I have been eating really well since the beginning of this challenge.  I've been mostly paleo with some tastes of things here and there to see how I handle it.  (Except for last weekends Hallowine, see the previous post for that story, LOL)  Wednesday night I came home and Nathan was upset about something and we had a small argument and MAN! stress drives me straight to the carbs.  Let's see, I want to remember correctly what I ended up eating.  I had already made a pork roast and small salt potatoes.  The potatoes were for Nathan and they were drowned in butter.  I had a few of those- maybe 3.  Then after dinner I had a slice of the leftover pizza from the weekend.  A thin crust meat lovers from pizza hut.  I saw myself spinning out of control and grabbed some raisins and walnuts and some chocolate.  It's hard to be totally honest about this, I keep wanting to make my eating habits sound better than they are.  Funny!

Anyway, my stomach is quite upset about Wednesdays shenanigans, still.  I feel bloated and gassy.  That's what I get.  Tonight I'm going dancing for Joanna's birthday.  It's a halloween bash through Arthur Murray.  Nathan's going to join me, so we're going to be late.  We're going to miss the pre-game cocktails, but that's okay because I really don't think I want to drink tonight.  I'm interested to know if Nathan's going to want to dance or not once we get there.  Hope so, that would be very cool.
I may try crossfit again in the morning.  I'm interested to know if their open house workout is always the same.  Or maybe yoga?  Don't know yet.  Last week I went to yoga and it was the one day that that particular instructor has ever cancelled.  Figures.  A sign?  Who knows....

Stress Eating

For some reason what I ate today for lunch made me feel really bloated around 5pm.  My stomach started to hurt, I could feel it pushing against my pants and it didn't feel better when I changed into stretchy pants upon reaching home.  I felt gassy.  Not sure what I ate that did that.  I didn't change my diet very much at all.  Then I got home and Nathan was mad at me for something, cause I was a bit of an idiot.  I lost a little control and had some potatoes with butter and a little of the brussel sprouts that I made for Nathan.  The only thing wrong with the sprouts was the processed butter sauce that it comes packaged with.  I made a delicious pork roast in the oven rubbed with salt and garlic powder.  So I ate two slices of that.  Then I still felt like I needed more and had some 90% cacao.  Oh boy.  Not horrible decisions, it's just that I could tell, I knew it was directly related to how I was feeling, not about being hungry.  In fact I felt the opposite of hungry when I came home.  Oh well.  I definitely feel like I need exercise that is more intense than my Tae Kwon Do.  I'm really sad about that.  I love the sport, but I think the dojang I'm at isn't competitive enough and doesn't workout hard enough.  I leave feeling tired... but only a little.  Just going to enjoy the rest of my wait until my vacay, do a shit-ton of work at work and get the house ready for Nathan's mom.  She's coming on November 3.  Hope you all ate better than I did and had a more intense workout than I did.  G'night!

Long Freaking Days

I've had a couple of long, stupid work days.  I'm getting frisky for my license so I can move on to having my own practice.  God, I can't wait.  I've eaten really well. Everything is in check.  Feeling good about the health.  I can't wait to go on vacation in 2 weeks, but because I'm going on vacation, the work I have to do in order to prepare is building up pretty quickly.  Have a great night.

The Truth

The Devil

I will not lie to you readers, on Saturday night I was completely unable to have just one glass of wine.  If you're trying not to drink, don't volunteer at a community event as a wine pourer.  Don't get me wrong, it was a blast.  Our costumes rocked and there was some really tasty food.  I did my best to stick to the meats, but I know that the sauces were full of everything that makes me bloated.  I'm sure there was sugar in there.  That's why I couldn't stop.  I kept going back for more- not for the turkey with no sauce, but for the meatballs and mushrooms drenched in some kind of manufactured bliss.  It was really difficult to stay away from it.  I did try some of the cheeses, I thought they would be higher quality, but they weren't.  So long story short, a good time was had, wine was drunk, meatballs were gorged upon and then I barfed all over my shower because I was too drunk to aim for the toilet.  Poor Nathan probably had a good reason to divorce me that night, it was really not pretty.
The good news:  eating healthy reduces the hangover effect.  I'm sure of it.  Normally my Sunday would have been nothing but groaning and wishing I could fall back asleep.  I wouldn't have moved from couch if I could have gotten myself there.  Not this time.  I woke up at 6:15am, cleaned out the showers- yes showers, I puked in both of them, did some dishes, caught up on this season of Fringe, and then sewed myself a dress.  I walked the dogs a few times.  I could see how the bad eating on Saturday night wanted to suck me back into the horrible cycle of empty carbs.  I woke up, considered what to eat and had a fried banana and eggs.  Doesn't sound delicious, but it was.  A cup of black coffee and some water did me for a few hours.  Then I took a quick nap and Nathan ordered a pizza and wings while I was down.  I had some of the thin crust pizza and then I had more... and I realized what was happening.  I was being sucked into the vortex of a bad eating frenzy.  Even after recognizing it I still had another piece of pizza later that evening and a few tastes of Nathan's Ben and Jerry's ice cream.  But, I didn't shame myself or beat myself over the head with guilt.  Instead I threw down some paleo-friendly snacks and food in between.  I had purple grapes, almonds, raisins and walnuts in no particular order.  For dinner I ate a huge steak and nothing else.  After I tasted Nathan's ice cream I had a bite of my 90% cacao bar and that satisfied the buds.
Like I said, this challenge is about really exploring how to make this a lifestyle change.  I don't think I was 100% effective this weekend, but I can use this as a learning experience.  Next time I am faced with a pizza I'm thinking I should take a piece and bring over a whole bunch of healthy snack to eat with it.  I know it sounds like I ate a whole bunch this weekend, and I did, but it could have been (and has been previously) much worse.  I was able to slow the demons and then halt them after a while.  Good business.  This morning I woke up feeling pretty great, walked the doggies and had eggs with ochra of all things.  (It was on sale at Safeway and is actually really good.)
This week I'm going to be pretty strict, especially as I get closer to heading home.  I want to be at my best.  I'm already feeling and looking really good.  Peace y'all.

Yoga

I'm going to round out this week with a yoga class at the Y.  It's been a while, hopefully I won't embarrass myself too bad.  I am the proud owner of some new t-shirt yoga pants I made last night, though, so it shouldn't be too bad.  I may stop at the Salvation Army afterwards and grab some more XL or XXL t-shirts.  These pants are super comfy and only took me a little while.  I've got to field test them today, then I'll make a few more if they're good for stretching.  I didn't even finish off my edges.  Last night when shopping I picked up a 90% cacao chocolate bar.  I had one square of it and that was perfect.  It's just bitter enough that you don't want to down a whole bar, but it satisfies that craving.  I'm starting to enjoy a lot of my food in much simpler form.  My coffee black, my chocolate more and more cacao and less sugar.  A good rare steak, a burger with a fried egg on top.  Veggies with salt and nothing else.  This year has been an awesome wake up call for me, to pay attention to my food and what exercise I'm doing and WHY.  I've learned to question conventional wisdom in all of it's forms, from what popular doctors say to do or take, to what religious leaders in different religions tell you to do, to what the government tells us to eat, to what exercises are good for you and why.  I've been questioning everything and trying to get to the root of it.  Why is it important?  Do I need all of this excess?  Is there a way I can simplify it and have it be just as awesome/tasty/effective?  Turns out most things in life can be way simpler and just as great.  Okay, on my way to yoga.  Have a great afternoon!

Update: Yoga was cancelled because the instructuor was having a tough day.  She was crying and I can only assume that something happened recently, she thought she could teach the class, but she was crying and couldn't do it.  So, I hiked the pillboxes.  I did the whole thing on my own for the first time, all the way around to the end of the Loop and back to the parking spaces.  The pants were fine except that if you are going to use t-shirt pants for hiking/jogging/running, you will want to add a tie to the waist.  As I got sweatier the pants got a little looser and they started to fall down a little.  Not too much, but enough for me to be hitching them up every once in a while.  The fold of material held my keys well when I rolled them up.  I ended up rolling down the waist band a whole bunch so I could pull them up easy every time they sagged a little.  Good pants, great I'm sure for yoga, some modifications necessary for running/jogging/hiking.

Here's where I got the initial pattern

Trial and Error

Yesterday I had a super long day.  I didn't have much time to stop and eat.  I ate with the kids in the office during their lunch time.  Then I raced over to my other school and had a couple of meetings until 4:30.  They were the kind of energy draining meetings that make me not want to work out.  Luckily Jak was at the last meeting and when I said I didn't feel like going to Tae Kwon Do she suggested walking the Lanikai Loop.  I agreed.  So I got home, had some almonds and raisins, changed and we walked the loop.  It was an okay workout, got the blood flowing, but I was just still exhausted when I got home.  I made dinner and for some reason dreamt about the chips in the fridge.  I kept feeling like I couldn't have any and it made me want them more.  Then I remembered that this challenge isn't about being super strict, it's about discovering how to make it a lifestyle.  So I stopped and thought to myself if I really wanted the chips.  I decided I did.  I had 4 chips and walked the dogs.  I really took notice of the taste of the chips and as usual, it wasn't as good as I imagined in my head.  So I stopped eating them.  They didn't really do it for me.  I think part of my problem, when super strict is that the imagined "unhealthy" food takes on this magical delicious taste and texture in my mind.  I keep thinking how wonderful it would be if I could just have a bite...   Well, mostly I know that's not true.  And when I'm not super tired I don't bother.  I have other delicious things to eat.  But when tired or under the weather, I may need to change tactics if the fantasy grows wildly.  I may need to stop and think whether or not I need to have some to stop the madness.  Last night it worked.  Monday it mostly worked, but I wasn't prepared.  I did not let the eating spiral out of control, however.  It's not that I think you shouldn't eat any snacks or carbs at all.  I know that for me, it's like crack-cocaine and I can get out of control.  I am retraining my brain to enjoy a smaller amount, in moderation.  Mostly I go without, but a planned snack is okay.

Also, I'm still deciding whether I should have a glass or two of wine tomorrow at Hallowine.  I may have a glass of wine, or my other options would be drink water all night, maybe in a fancy glass, or to have a drink like a gin and tonic.  I don't even know if that last will be available though.  What are your thoughts?  Continue to work this challenge to be about moderation?  I don't know.  I kind of like how I feel after not drinking.  Maybe I should wait until tomorrow to see how I'm feeling.  If I'm tired and stressed out I might not be able to handle just having one or two glasses, I might go totally overboard.

Quick Update

Feeling pretty good, nothing new here.  I'm waking up really well, dragging my ass to work and getting through the day.  I've been prepping lunch, so I'm always prepared for the munchies if I get em.  And since I've had a lot of desk/paperwork recently, I've had em.  I have two meeting running at the same time this afternoon.  When those are done, I am definitely going to go home and relax!

Day 11 of Challenge

Well, the magical quality of my challenge is long past.  The first couple of days there is usually that psyched up feeling of yeah, I'm doing something awesome!  Then there's the next couple of days where your body changes if your challenge involves any big difference in health or diet.  Then the plateau comes.  I have hit that point.  The other day I couldn't help myself and had a taste of this cake from Costco.  That was the only time I've broken form in the past 11 days.  Otherwise, I've been doing really great.  Now it's just same old, same old.  The magic is gone.  At least I don't have dreams about eating cake or cookies or milk like I used to back in January.  That was rough!  Anyone who did the original Whole 30 challenge with me in January can attest to how horrible those dreams are.  The guilt!  I don't have that anymore.  I know that if I eat something like that my life will not end.
This latest challenge, I have discovered over the last few days, is not actually about eating 100% paleo or strict anything.  It is a way for me to learn how to eat healthy and remain that way at a stable pace.  This past year I have gone from strict paleo and skinny to alcoholic binge cake eater and 140, and up and down, and up and down... and now I'm trying to even it out.  I want to learn how to eat awesome and not be an asshole.  That means that sometimes your office will have something like Boss' Day, spend a lot of money on a cake, and be offended if you don't eat some.  Usually that would result in me being an asshole and refusing any, or having a small piece, and then a bigger piece, and then a BIGGER piece and then go home and drink and snack because, what the hell, I ate bad all day anyway, didn't I?  On Monday I had a small piece of cake.  It stared at me for the rest of the day because we had a meeting in the room with the cake.  Then I had another small taste, and then... I stopped.  I went home and ate some almonds and raisins.  I made my planned steak and salad dinner.  I didn't raid the fridge for dessert, although I have some 86% chocolate in the freezer for those times that I'm feeling a little desperate.  I have maintained and I think that lesson is even more important for me this time around then losing a lot of weight because I'm eating better.  I don't want to be the yo-yo dieter.  I want to always eat awesome.  But I want to be able to have a gin and tonic or a glass of wine.  Can I have both?  I think it's probably possible.
The other thing I've noticed over the course of this challenge is that, unfortunately, it's looking like Tae Kwon Do is not enough exercise for me.  Last night I had what used to be an intense workout for me and today I'm not tired or even slightly sore.  I'm no masochist, I don't enjoy the pain post-workout, but let's be honest, I don't want to be semi-in shape.  I want to be really in shape.  I'm thinking that I am going to test for my orange belt in November, maybe test for my green belt in January.  By that time I'll definitely be done.  I might not even continue after my orange belt.  I may switch to cross fit.  I don't really want to be that guy that changes sports like they change their underwear, but the truth is I need to find the right sport that meets my standards.  It needs to be a hard, challenging workout.  It needs to keep me entertained (nothing really repetitive or boring).  I need to have some friends with me.  And I need someone (a coach) to tell me what to do.  So far I haven't found any sport that has met those standards.  I would love it if my friends wanted to do volleyball or Tae Kwon Do, or Kickboxing, but they don't.  I love Tae Kwon Do in general, but it's often not challenging enough for me and they don't compete.  Which is good, cause I don't want to get punched in the head, but at the same time, I need something to push me forward.

Up a Pound

From truhealthquest.com

So I gained a pound, no biggie.  I think that's pretty minimal considering how my weekends used to screw up any weight loss goals I ever had.  The weekends have always been a source of difficulty because there's so much time to snack!  I fought back this weekend by keeping busy- I did crossfit, then cleaned the guest bedroom, then cleaned the wine fridge to sell, made a yummy lobster dinner, watched good tv.  That was Saturday.  Sunday I walked on the beach with Nathan and my doggies, then hiked with Jak, Joanna and Gizmo, blogged a little, went to Savers to look for a Halloween costume, did some grocery shopping, donated some clothing, sewed up a Kimono and made a delicious Steak dinner with a spinach salad on the side.  In between I tried to drink a lot of water.  I still snacked a lot, but at least I had tako poke, almonds, raisins, pickles, and some other dried fruit in the fridge.  It's not a great idea to eat too much dried fruit, but seriously, what's better, satisfying my sweet tooth with some dried dates or caving in to the curly Cheetos in the fridge?  I'm sure that pound came from all the snacking- healthy or not.
Now don't get me wrong.  I need to make this clear- losing and gaining one pound is natural, your body swings back and forth one to two pounds all the time!  So I'm not concerned, I'm just updating.  Also, weight is not the best indicator of your health/fitness/body shape, it's just the easiest and most convenient.  I may have gained a pound, but I'm comfortably wearing a pair of pants today that squeezed my legs and belly a bit last week.  And yes, I wear these pants often, I'm a bit poor these days.
Just as an aside, can I comment for a moment on how freaking hilarious the Lipozene commercials are?  Apparently weight gain is "not your fault!"  It's just due to lack of exercise, poor eating habits, and sitting around all day.  These are the claims of the commercial:
• 78% of each Pound Lost is PURE BODY FAT.
• Lipozene diet pills are backed by multiple clinical studies.
• REDUCE POUNDS of Body Fat and Weight WITHOUT a
change in lifestyle
• Lipozene weight loss supplements are safe and effective

First of all, I want to know what the other 22% of each pound lost consists of.  Second, I want to know when taking care of yourself became someone else's responsibility.  Third, I can't get the voice of the lady, who says, "my husband said, Look at you!" out of my head.  I don't know, watch it for yourself.  But please, please, please do not believe a word they are saying.  There is not a drug that already exists or is going to exist that will take away all of your problems.  Any pill or fad diet that makes you lose weight depends on you continuing to buy and take whatever it is that they are selling.  When you stop taking the pills or drinking the shakes you will gain the weight back plus more.  Trust me, I've been there.  I love infomercials.

Crossfit and Paleo

I'm feeeling pretty freaking good this morning.  I've been going strong paleo for a full seven days and I'm past the initial "this is hard" whiny faze.  It's not really hard.  It's delicious.  My fridge and freezer are also better stocked, so I have something to shove in my face when my husband is eating vanilla ice cream.  I weighed in at 134 this morning.  Anybody who tries to count calories or tries to starve themselves to lose weight should really try this way of eating.  I am never hungry.  I have tons of energy.  And I don't feel guilty for eating too much steak and broccoli.  So that's my healthy eating challenge plan.
Yesterday morning I also tried Crossfit in Kailua.  It was an intro class and I'm sure it was only a taste of the craziness that Crossfit entails, and we were using the lightest weights, but I have a good soreness in the body.  Not too horrible, I can just tell which muscles I used yesterday more than others.
This morning Nathan and I walked the beach with the dogs, not too far, and Jak and I are going to hike Nuuanu Judd trail in 45 minutes.  Then off to Savers to buy a Halloween costume.
All in all I'm feeling pretty good.  I'll have to take another picture in the same outfit that's on the site.  My belly looks more tight already.  Eating grains and beans just makes me bloated, so when I knock them out of my diet, my stomach tightens up pretty fast.  That's worth it, even if I didn't lose any weight.
Hope everyone else is sticking to their 30 day challenge!  Myia has challenged herself not to eat any fast food, including french fries!  That's hard, but she's gonna do it and when the challenge is over she's gonna make another change towards a healthier diet.  Arin's been running like crazy and I can't wait to see her!  So stop being a pussy and do something for 30 days to make yourself healthier!  We can do it, so can you!

I am Freaking Awesome

From picturesof.net

I got home from work yesterday and I was so exhausted that all I wanted to do was take a nap.  I still made a burger and fries for Nathan and a burger- no bun with pickle and onions for myself.  I opted not to go to Tae Kwon Do.  I hate doing that.  It's only twice a week, but I was really, really tired.  I watched TV, snacked on some sunflower seeds and dried prunes (seriously, don't knock it til you've tried it), drank a lot of water and went to bed early.  This morning I slept in a little later than normal and took my time getting ready for the day.  I took a few sick hours so I can pull myself together and be ready for the three back to back meetings I have in a little bit.  What a good idea.  I'm a genius.  I had my cup of coffee and my eggs with sausage and now I'm feeling really good.  I could have done what most people do- suck it up and go to TKD and go to work on time instead of taking care of themselves.  I could have gone to TKD and been really off.  I could have gone to work on time, but I wouldn't have felt like talking to anybody or been able to concentrate on paperwork.  I was really tired.  But now I'm getting ready to go and I'm feeling energized.  The people that I meet with later are going to get way more energy, motivation and effective feedback from me because I took a little time for myself.  Our world is a little backwards when it comes to the job force.  We are encouraged to watch the clock, punch in and out at exact times, we are not given reinforcement for doing a good job.  I certainly don't get any incentives for any of the awesome stuff I do.  I've decided over the past year that it's my life and I am going to steer it in the direction I want it to go.  If for some ungodly reason I got let go for taking sick hours for self-care instead of being vomitous or snotty, then they will just be kicking themselves in the asses again anyway.  Cause I do a good job.  And when I take care of myself, I do a better job.  Anyway, just another aspect of health that sometimes we forget about.  Exercise is important.  Eating healthy is important.  Taking care of yourself mentally is also very, very important.
Oh, and I lost another pound, even though I didn't go to my hard core exercise class last night.

It's too early

Woke up super early this morning cause of cramps.  Hope the day goes okay even though I didn't sleep very well.  Writing because being tired is one of my easy excuses to eat terribly.  Too tired to prepare lunch, prepare good breakfast, prepare good dinner.  Tired so I feel like snacking to make myself feel better.  Not gonna do that today.  I'm at one of my schools today, so I'm going to have to make sure I get out and walking around to give myself some energy, instead of slumping in front of my computer.  That's the plan, we'll see how it goes!

Eating Out

Day 2.  Eating out at restaurants is difficult.  I brought my breakfast and snack with me to our training today, but the group wanted to go to Chili's for lunch.  There were a few salads that I could have gotten away with on the menu, but they were 14 dollars a piece!  For salad?  No way.  I refuse.  So I got the house salad, no dressing.  I forgot to ask for no cheese or croutons, so I just shoved em to the side.  The waitress brought out some lemon and I squeezed that all over the salad.  It was really good, actually.  The most difficult part is looking at the menu.  Restaurant menus make everything look SO good.  I am positive that there was no way to make any of the other menu items paleo or cheaper.  So the house salad was a good choice.  For dinner I had some ground beef with salsa and some leftover coconut milk.  I envisioned it tasting much better than it did.  I think I overdid the coconut milk this past week.  I've put it in just about everything, so I think I was just a little over it.  Luckily that was the end of the can, so I can take a little break and have some more in a week or so.  Went for a walk with the ladies around the Lanikai loop and now I'm feeling like going to sleep. Good night!

Da Da Duh! It has begun!

From laxcrossfit.com

Hello all, today begins my 30 day paleo/primal challenge.  I did one serious paleo challenge in January and I never felt better.  I hesitate to call it a "diet" although that technically is what it is.  However, it is simply a direction for you to turn to eat healthy.  There are no gimmicks involved like, drink this or take that and you'll drop weight.  You don't count calories, you don't starve yourself.  You don't over eat one food type.  It is a kind of healthy eating that for the most part makes complete and total common sense.  Main goal of paleo- eat lots of veggies, meats, nuts and fruits.  Don't eat processed food or sugar.  The part that is hard for people is the dairy, the legumes, the grains and the soy.  Well, and alcohol, but as much as we all love alcohol, it does make complete and total sense that not drinking will help you lose weight.  I think for me, this healthy way of eating rocks because: I love meat, I love vegetables, I love nuts, I love fruit.  I love cooking for myself, so the processed thing isn't hard.  Difficult for me: finding condiments with no added sugar.  It is fucking ridiculous what things have added sugar in them.  Like I said, I love cooking, but do I really want to have to make any sauce I add?  NO.  But there are very limited options.  Even bacon, people.  Bacon has sugar.  The grains part of the challenge is the hardest part.  Not because I can't cook without adding grains and that my meals aren't absolutely fantastic without grains, but because I really love bread.  It's the yeasty smell and the texture.  Bread has brought me down again and again this year when I'm not on a strict challenge.  The alcohol and ice cream were hard for me a couple of times, but it truly is the bread.
The breakdown in healthy eating usually goes like this for me: I have a glass of wine/beer/gin and tonic.  I drink too much of it.  I feel like a need a  piece of toast (which my brain is convinced in it's alcohol addled state is the only thing that will make my stomach feel better).  I realize I have eaten what I know to be food that makes me feel bad.  I think to myself, well I'm already going to feel like shit tomorrow, I might as well have some ice cream.  With chocolate syrup on top.  And a cookie.  And a chocolate bar.  Seriously, this is a story I've lived through many times before.  So, I'm going full strict paleo again this month.

This morning for breakfast I had 3 eggs with some coconut cream and salsa.  Delicious.  I have been drinking my coffee black since January and surprisingly, I love it that way.  Later today I'm gonna have some london broil stir fried with veggies, no need for rice or noodles.  I have almonds, baby carrots and pickled cucumbers on hand for snacking.  I am not sure what lunch will be yet, but it will either be tuna or roast beef from the deli.  I love adding salsa, coconut milk, coconut cream or eggs to everything.

The best part about this diet for me?  It truly feels like how I am meant to eat.  I feel like I am feeding myself well.  I don't feel hungry often and when I do, I just eat.  There will be times that I am busy at work and I don't get a chance to sit down for lunch and I work straight through without snacks or anything.  And I don't get that sick, low blood sugar feeling.  At some point I just start feeling hungry and I'm like, oh yeah, I should eat and I do.  I don't feel like I am starving or over full.  I don't feel deprived of all of those things that are off the list.  When you read the research- and I'll link to a few sites at the bottom where you can- it makes me feel like I'm treating my body with respect and fueling up for whatever crazy adventure is in store for me in the future.

Feel free to join me, you don't have to go paleo, although I do highly recommend it.  But there are people who do really well eating rice and gluten-free or eating oatmeal and soy.  If you are that type of person and want to join me doing a 30 day challenge of whatever healthy eating means for you, do it!  Comment here!

Links for paleo/primal that I love:
Mark Sisson- marksdailyapple.com
Robb Wolf- robbwolf.com
The Whole30, Version 4.0- http://whole9life.com/2011/06/whole-30-v4/

If I forgot any, please comment and leave the sites below.






Yikes! I posted this and realized that I'm totally going to have to do before and after pictures.  Maybe just of my belly.  I'll put the pics up later.

Whoopsie!

Just a totally unrelated picture of my dogs, Titus and Gizmo

I ate so awesome yesterday!  I ran with the dogs, snacked on baby carrots and almonds, had meatballs for lunch!  Then came dinner.  Well, really it wasn't so bad.  Dinner itself was steak and an endive barbecued on the grill with parmesian cheese on top.  Quite delicious and filling.  We threw a few banana peppers on the grill as well, just to see what would happen.  It was quite good!  Nathan came home with some fruit to cut up for a fruit salad and I threw a bunch in a glass with some strawberry rum.  And here's where things went downhill a bit.  The darn alcohol made me feel like I really wanted some ice cream and a cookie.  With fudge on top.  Oh well.  After eating that I decided to go to bed rather than raid the fridge for something else.  I'm still doing really well, I don't think I've lost any weight, but I'm swinging the pendulum back to healthy lifestyle.  It's amazing to see how far to the other side I had swung.  Exercising a little bit every day, and eating much better.  I've been through this before.  I have to wait for my body to get used to this then step it up a notch.  Then the body weight starts to drop a bit and I'll do my best to continue eating healthy.  I am starting a 30 day challenge tomorrow because today I have 31 days until the plane leaves for the East Coast.  If anyone's actually reading this, some support and encouragement would be very welcome.  I have been having a hard time keeping myself on track.  It's easier when you're able to be held accountable.  If anything, just drop a note and tell me if you're going to check in or not, then I'll be embarrassed if I say I'm going for it and don't.
I am getting super duper excited about my trip East!  I have a month to be sure that my work is covered and my doggies are well taken care of while I'm gone.  Nathan's mother is coming out here on the 3rd of November, so I'll see her for a few days before I leave.  At least he'll have someone out here with him.

Being a good girl

So proud of myself.  Last night was Ananda's birthday celebration at a local restaurant.  I did not have any wine, fondue, fried calamari, or dipping sauce.  I didn't want to be an asshole, it was a birthday celebration after all, so I ordered a gin and tonic, nursed it all night and pounded water.  I had some of their sweet potato fries without their dipping sauce.  I had a very small taste of the Tiramisu they gave Ananda for her birthday and tasted the chocolate cake that Nathan got for himself.  A very small taste on the end of my spoon.  The smartest thing I did was fill myself up with the meatballs and sauce I made before we left.  I ate more than I normally would.  The smart thing about that was that I was already over full with good food and only had one or two bites to taste, I wasn't hungry or even very tempted.  It also helped that I finished my workout an hour and a half before getting there.  I'm never really hungry after a workout.
The best part about it all is how freaking good I feel this morning.  Not the way I usually feel after spending a fun night with the group.  And I had a fantastic time!  I didn't have less fun because I wasn't drinking or snacking.  I had a blast!  And I didn't feel like I was getting drowsy when it was time to leave.  I was tired, but it was a good, it's time to go to bed soon because it's late feeling, not a holy balls I'm drunk and need to lay down feeling.  I also didn't come home and snack on every unhealthy food I could find.  I just had some more water and went to bed.  Awesome night.

Bleh

Whoa.  Seriously sore from yesterday's workout.  It feels kind of good.  It's fine until I start walking.  Then my thighs and my hips and my knee hurt.  This morning I prepared quite the paleo lunch and am downing tons of water.  I am trying not to get impatient with the weight loss that I know will come with time.  I just need to stick with it.  I have TKD tonight, and then afterwards I am going out with a friend to celebrate her birthday.  I need to plan ahead.  I know they  have good salads there, and I can drink some kind of seltzer water.  I was eating mostly healthy over the weekend, but I haven't started to feel the effects of eating better until this morning.  I feel less bloated.

The Jungle Gym

Didn't write this morning because I was too busy out and about being awesome.  I made a spur of the moment decision at 6:15am after a brief dog walk that I should go for a run.  I donned the vibrams and took off.  The sun was just rising and I decided to sprint as fast as I could to the closest park.  It's only about 2 blocks away. I then proceeded to kick the jungle gyms ass.  I creamed the monkey bars with my pullups, whipped the castle bridge with my squats and climbed the shit out of the swirly ladder.  The swings took a total beating with my super pumps (aka swinging on the swings).  I climbed a tree, planked and pushupped, dive bombed from a bench and leapt over the chain link fence.  After that I got a quick sip of water and tore off down the road back to my cave.
Get off your ass.  This workout was superfun.  I'm exhausted, all of my muscles are sore, I got to work on time and I'm in a great mood.  Highly recommended.

P.S.- No animals or jungle gym equipment was actually hurt during this episode.

Get Yo' Mind Right Foo!

The past couple of days have been semi-productive in terms of losing weight/getting back in shape.  I am slowly veering back to health.  Yesterday and this weekend, I opted for mainly paleo food choices, but then had a few beers and a few chocolate cookies.  Yesterday I went to the beach park fully intending to work out on the jungle gym, but as I was walking over to it, a police officer calmly got out of his car and wrote me a parking ticket.  I felt like an idiot because I did not understand the signs.  Apparently you are not allowed to park next to the park.  Anyway, I was upset, walked around a little, then drove home.  I picked up the doggies and walked them to a field nearby.  So overall I did a lot of walking instead of the pullups, dive bombers and planks I had planned.  Not horrible, just slowly easing in.  Tonight I have Tae Kwon Do, so I don't worry that I won't get a good workout today.  I also did a quick walk around the school campus.  I've been drinking more water and in doing so, I now realize how little water I had been drinking previously.  It's amazing how much better you feel with a bit of hydration.
What I have been most focused on is getting my mind in the right space.  The guilt about not eating right or exercising is killer.  It sabotages all of your positive forward motion.  I haven't eaten "clean" the past couple of days, but I'm going in the right direction and I want to keep that motion going.

Feeling Very Primal

Yesterday I watched the Discovery Channel special "I, Caveman, Back to the Stone Age and The Great Hunt."  Two episodes of 10 people that are sent to live like cavemen for 10 days.  It was pretty well done, of course there was a lot of focus on any whining and a lot of what I assume was the good stuff was edited out.  However, after 7 days and everyone is starving, they go off to hunt an elk.  It was extremely moving.  It is the only time I've ever actually felt compelled to watch a killing like that.  I can't watch lions hunt on those wildlife shows, but I had to watch as they speared a huge elk, and then dressed it using stone age rock weapons.  It was really sad, and made me think about where the food I eat comes from.  It gives you a whole other perspective.  For me this was more moving and powerful than those movies where they show the horrible conditions of slaughterhouses and stuff.  It was really dirty and, well, primal.  It made me look with more appreciation on farms that raise and slaughter animals humanely.  It is much easier to block out those scenes of dirty cows all crammed into a small room than to block out the eyes of the elk as it died.  

Anyway, the point of all this is that it gave me a boost to think about the food I'm putting into my body.  It made me feel a little more connected to being a human being whose ancestors had to walk for miles to chase down an animal with sticks.   

Rough Start

My Kryptonite

To the right is why my healthy eating kind of started yesterday. I wasn't hungry for breakfast after all the crap I ate Friday night, but I went the healthiest I could think of for lunch at the Windward Mall- sushi. There wasn't much options there. It kept me full for quite a while, the ahi and avocado, and wasabi did a good job. Then I went to the Windward Ho‘olaule‘a 2011, watched a great hula show and looked at amazing jewelry made by local artists. Joanna had bought some cookies, but I was good I had just a few tastes. Dinner was steak that I pan fried then put in the oven to finish, and corn on the cob to the side. For any of my paleo friends reading this, I am not rushing into the paleo side of things. I have stuff in my fridge that needs to be eaten. I think this hurt me the last couple of times I've declared I'm going to eat healthy because I feel guilty that they're in there. I'm going to phase out the non-paleo foods, starting with carbs. That I can avoid easily, especially because I know Nathan will eat anything I don't, so nothing will go to waste. He went out and got a whole bunch of paleo groceries yesterday for me, which. is. awesome!!! So we have lots of meat, veggies and fruits. Much easier for me this time. He also got himself hot pockets for those times I'm not around making dinner.

So anyway, off track, last night I had salad with the ladies after dinner, but also had some guinness and red wine. I snacked on all paleo goodies until I got home and had that "too much wine" feeling in my stomach, which I swear is only fixed by a piece of toast. I had an English Muffin, felt better and went to bed soon after. This morning I am not going to beat myself up because I made a lot of good choices in there. I think that's important for anyone not doing a challenge with a shit ton of support. If you beat yourself up for any mistake it makes you feel guilty and so many of us make ourselves feel better with all of those foods we were just feeling guilty about eating in the first place... not a very useful cycle. So I'm just starting my day with some eggs with veggies. We'll see how the rest of the day goes. Hopefully it includes some hiking/walking with the hubby and the dogs.

Primal Challenge

So far I've had a crazy year health wise.  I started off 2011 with an awesome Paleo Challenge.  It was an excellent experiment to see what foods are healthiest for me.  I was the most fit I've ever been.  After the challenge I slowly started adding back more and more junk.  It wasn't on purpose, it's just happened over time.   Then, the past two months several of my friends had a lot going on and subsequently I drank a lot of wine, and ate a ton of food that I know makes me feel like shit and makes me gain weight.  I did have a hell of a time though, so there's no regrets.  My current belly is a tribute to the great friend I was being.  Now I must face the fact that, for my own sanity, I cannot continue that lifestyle.  It is not only annoying not to be able to fit into some of my clothing, but I feel my emotions begin to rollercoaster again.  I am pretty comfortable in my body, I was 175 a few years ago, and that was okay, I was 120 earlier this year, that was cool too.  At 140, I know I'm a hot piece of ass, but I am not my healthiest.  The month of October for me is going to be dedicated to getting back in shape and eating better.  I think that means paleo.  I know I've said I'm going to start eating better several times in the past few months, but this time I definitely mean it.  I want to buy a dress for Arin's wedding, and I would like to be able to wear all of the clothes that Anna has packed for me for the visit to the East Coast.  There are so many reasons to eat healthier and workout one more day a week than I currently am.  As I sit here I am mentally memorizing what my gut feels like after eating horribly last night and drinking several guinness, so when the time comes to make a choice, I will remember it and go for the food that is going to make me feel less bloated.  After I post this I'm going to see if there's a way to put a countdown on the blog.  I need a visual reminder of how many days I have left until my Journey to the East.  As of today I have 5 weeks. That's 35 days for those of you who can't do simple math.  To my loyal followers:  Any other places I can stick a countdown that you know of?  There must be an android phone app or perhaps a facebook or google calendar application?  Ideas?

Sidenote: I do love the way life throws fabulous little seeming coincidences at you all the time.  I was just thinking that I would like to add a picture to the blog to brighten it up, picked up my phone because I thought it made a noise (which it didn't), noticed my Tarot card of the day was The Fool!  It's brilliant because The Fool represents new adventures.  I quote from the app "the journey begins fresh, innocent, and full of potential."  Quite an apt card for today.