May Updates

Sorry for the hiatus, I know you've all been dying to know what I've been up to lately.  ;)  I have mostly been blogging on my new site, Find Your Joy.  One of my New Year's Resolutions for this year was to work on my Spirituality and this new blog focuses much more on that.  I didn't mean to wait 5 months to update on my resolutions, but better late than never, I figure.

The big resolution that I have been working on, other than what is addressed in my other blog, is being less anal about my diet/nutrition.  I have not weighed myself since January.  I stopped using my weight to track how I felt about my body.  I decided that I would relax the rules on the paleo, eat what I felt my body wanted, and get more in tune with how my body feels, rather than how much it weighs or even how it looks. This has been an up and down journey.

Not weighing myself- turns out this is no big deal.  I never did throw my scale out, I have a feeling that as soon as I chuck it, I'm going to want to weigh myself and go buy myself a new one.  So it sits in the bathroom corner, forgotten.  There was a part of me that was afraid that if I didn't weigh myself constantly the weight would creep up and all of a sudden I would weigh 175 again.  The truth is, I can tell very easily, by looking at myself in the mirror and by guaging how my pants and shirts are feeling, how I am doing.  In the morning, I do a quick naked flex in the mirror (come on, don't lie to me, you know you do, too!) and check the size of my belly and arms, because these are the parts of my body that seem to get bigger first.  I make sure to admire what I'm seeing.  I don't focus on the negative.  I just check in.  It may sound silly to you, but I ask my body how it's doing, if there's anything it's trying to tell me.  If there's pain I check in with it, too.  I'm a lot more in tune with my body now than ever.

Relaxing the paleo rules- this one was harder.  I am very good when I have strict rules to follow.  Do eat this, don't eat that.  Takes a lot of the pressure off of deciding.  It's a yay or nay.  But with that comes the feeling of rebellion.  Sometimes you just want a little alcohol or a donut for Pete's sake.  And when I go strict Paleo, I don't allow myself to have it, and then when I'm "done" with my whole 30 or I relax a little I buy a 50 ct. of red velvet with cream cheese chips cookies and eat the whole thing in less than a week.  This has just not seemed to me to be the best way to go about things.  So in January, with the new year, I was motivated to eat well and I didn't do a challenge.  I just listened to my body.  It went extraordinarily well for about 2 months.  I prioritized the paleo foods, meat, veg, fruit, nuts, and then just checked in with myself before eating anything "non-paleo."  I would have a donut here or there, buying one from the grocery store, instead of a dozen.  I would enjoy it, then go on my merry way.  In March I began to notice that this was happening more and more often and in April I really started to go overboard and I actually got sick.  Not sick from the food directly, but my energy got lower, I wasn't sleeping as well, my mind was getting foggier, I was feeling more and more negative and then I literally got sick and caught the bug that was going around the school I work at.  And because my energy was low and my stress and negativity were high, I got really sick.  I took off almost a whole week of school, which is not usual for me.  I don't mind taking off when I get sick, but I usually heal up in a day and can get back to work.  This knocked me down.

And so I declared that May first I would begin to eat better again.  Again, I have decided that I am not going to do a "challenge."  I think nutritionally this has become a crutch for me and I am determined to be able to eat without stressing myself out about it.  Well, today is May 6.  I have been eating very well.  Last night, my husband brought home from the grocery store, two slices of Lilikoi cheese cake.  This is a most delicious dessert that we have had before.  I had a decision to make.  Do I want the cheese cake?  How do I want to handle this?  I decided to go for it.  I savored every mouth-watering bite.  I took my time.  It was scrumptious.  And my husband got to enjoy that I enjoyed the cake.  Today, I do not feel any worse for the wear.  I don't feel guilty.  I don't feel bloated.  I don't feel like I am going to rush to the grocery store for a 50 pack of cookies after work.  I planned ahead this weekend and got healthy food for the week, so my lunches are planned out for the week.  I just ate a pear.  The experiment continues to be a success, although it is seriously not easy to move from strict counting calories or restricting food to listening to your body.  I have a feeling that this is another one of those skills that will get easier over time.

I continue to focus on my Core Desired Feelings in every moment of every day.  Living authentically and making an effort to feel how I want to feel all the time, not just when I'm on vacation, has been splendid.  I highly suggest you decide to make that commitment to yourself, too.

How have you been doing in 2013?  Where are you in your New Year's goals?  Now is a good time to recommit.  Be sure to comment on your progress below!

New Year's Health Goals

It's been a while since I've written on the Life, Health, and Food blog, since I've been on a bit of a spiritual hiatus.  I had completed a paleo challenge with the Crossfit Oahu team, this time called "Natural November."  I did great and once again was looking pretty fit at the end.  When the challenge was over I repeated my same cycle of eating massive amounts of "non-paleo" foods- especially anything with wheat and sugar (cookies, bread, crackers), alcohol and some fried foods.  I've gone through this many times and blogged about it before.  I have no definitive answers.  All I know is that every time I complete a challenge I "fall off the wagon" but every time it is not as destructive to my body.  Since I've been doing the spiritual thing I thought to myself that I would just ride this out and see what happened.  To just really go for it, to listen to my body and try to figure out what I really wanted and see what came out of that.  I didn't want to stop myself and promise that I would eat "better."  I wanted to wait for something to tell me it was time.  So for much of December I had strange combinations of Oreos, whipped cream and bacon for breakfast, if that's what I was craving.  If I felt like eating a "paleo" dinner, I would.  If I felt like potato chips for dinner, I'd go for it.  And if I wanted the entire bag of potato chips in one sitting, then I let go and ate them.  And for some reason, I never felt guilty.  The whole month of December I listened to my body.  I had a couple of evenings where I had some cravings and I walked to Safeway with the express purpose of finding what it was that would fill that craving.  I wandered all the aisles and I decided nothing was off limits.  Was it pickles? Was it cookies? Was it pretzels? Was it cookie dough? Anybody following me around would think I was crazy.  People go to the grocery store with lists!  I just wandered.  I'd pick something up and put it in my basket, but I might get to another aisle and decide that no, this chocolate bar would be better.  I stopped stuffing down the craving beast and let it out into the open.  I talked to it.  I listened.  Sometimes we had a miscommunication.  Turns out the cookie dough was not ever really the answer.  One time I picked just the right donut and enjoyed every single bite.  One evening it was pretzels and Guinness.  It was really fun to explore this feeling.  I've written a little about this before, too.  Do I want something crunchy?  Something sweet?  Something fatty or fried?  While I wandered around the store I had time to really pinpoint it.  As the end of December was nearing I began to have moments where I doubted myself.  I thought I would have to do another challenge or set some restrictive goals- goodbye bread and alcohol.  As I was washing dishes one day I thought, "Okay, tomorrow I will go back to eating healthy."  And it was strange.  I've gotten so used to questioning my thoughts and beliefs and this time, I didn't believe myself.  I was saying it, but it was untrue.  So I took it back.  I told myself I would not make a commitment or goal about restricting something from my diet until I could feel it was time.  A couple more times I had the thought that I was ready, but it wasn't true.  Then for some reason on December 18 in the bright and early pre-dawn hours I woke up and thought, "Okay, I'm ready."  And it was true.  It was a release.  I didn't have to stuff my face with sweets, but I didn't have to restrict myself completely anymore.  And still, I waited for the New Year to start eating better.  I wanted to make sure.  And for the rest of the month, I felt like I was saying goodbye.  Farewell, Guinness.  Farewell, wine.  Farewell, bagels.
For 2013, I'm not going to drink.  I am not completely restricting myself, if there is an important social gathering I'm not saying I'm "not allowed."  But I don't think I will.  I am also going to continue to listen to my body to tell me what I want to eat.  But it won't be the same things that I wanted before.  I am going to continue to ask myself if my next action will lead me to feeling one of my Core Desired Feelings: Powerful, Energized, Connected, Clear and Free.
As for fitness I have a few goals, they include being able to do 5 handstand pushups, being able to lift 65 pounds for my overhead squat.  To be able to do 5 muscle-ups, and increasing my mobility.  I would love to be able to do a split.  I'm so inflexible.
My other resolution for the year is that I intend to be more authentic every moment of every day.
What are your resolutions for this year?

Treats in Moderation

Super Sweet!

Amazingly enough, I just had to go back and look to see how long it's been since the Paleo challenge ended.  Since May 15, I've been sticking to my Level 7 Paleo with the exception of being able to have 3 treats a week.  I was unsure of how this was going to go.  In my last post I mentioned that I didn't really feel like having any treats.  It's true.  The results I get from eating Paleo / primal style are insanely worthwhile.  I lost 20 pounds eating tons of good food.  I only workout twice a week most weeks.  Granted, Crossfit workouts are pretty intense, but talk about a sustainable lifestyle.  So do I really want to eat bread?  And then try to "run off all the excess calories?"  Do I really want to eat sugar?  The truth is, when I think for a second instead of just grabbing for something to eat, I really don't want or need it.  I had some dried pineapple the other day that I could have sworn had added sugar on it.  I triple checked the ingredients, it was from Whole Foods, who kindly make all of their ingredients very visible and public.  The truth was, I just have gotten used to the natural sweetness of fruit and the pineapple was very, very sweet on it's own.  (Brilliant aside, if there is ever a need for sweetening something like paleo bread or muffins or adding sweetness to a barbecue sauce, those dried pineapples are an amazing substitution, just chop into small pieces.)  I know there are people who will read this and shake their heads in sadness, because I am now "missing out" on some of the pleasures in life.  I used to be one of those people.  Amazingly, I have changed my palette to the point that some of the most simple fruits, meats, vegetables, and spices are those pleasures in life.  I get to eat amazing food all the time.  I don't have to save up my calories so that I can have a slice of cheesecake after dinner and then feel guilty about it or feel like I have to accomodate for it somehow.  I can just eat good food all day long.  Whole Foods moving in down the road has also given me a wide variety of dried fruit that doesn't have sugar added to it.  Pears, apples, pineapples, bananas, raisins, figs, dates, and my all time favorite Mexican Mango.  I could eat that all day long. (And even if I did, I wouldn't feel bad about it.)

Yum!!!

I'm not saying that I don't have to put any effort into staying thin and in shape.  That is what the media and "the man" would tell you is your ultimate goal.  Buy this, then you don't put in any effort!  It's easy!  Not true.  It's just that I enjoy the effort now.  I have figured out some way to cut corners to make paleo simpler, with less steps to cook stuff.  I have ADHD and need things to be simple, few ingredients and with little planning involved.  I need to have several standby recipes and stuff that I can go to when I have forgotten to pull something out of the freezer.  It takes getting used to, but there are items that I always get when I'm at the grocery store.  That way, I always have a backup plan.  For example, pureed pumpkin and coconut milk.  Two items you can buy canned, that last forever.  You can combine them when you're in a jam, with whatever other ingredients you happen to have in your fridge, maybe add a little curry powder or paste and wham!  Delicious soup!  I also always have eggs.  No matter what, I can always make eggs.  And you can do so many things with them that I never get bored.  One of the other items I always have is a rotisserie chicken from the grocery store.  Now, I know strict paleo/organic folks will tell me that there is most likely sugar somewhere in there and it is probably not pasture raised.  I know this.  In my life right now, this works and I feel healthy.  I have started a recipe book that will share some of my easy shortcuts.  I hope it is something that will encourage people who are interested in trying out paleo/primal, but are concerned about costs and the ability to cook.  Anyone who knows me well knows that if there is a shortcut that will make my life easier, but will not noticeably decrease the ultimate goal, then I will find it.  And I've found a lot of paleo shortcuts.

Treating Myself

Actually the point of this post was going to be that last week I did treat myself.  I thought about it all day, what treat was I going to buy?  I planned and thought about it and then when I was at the grocery store I wandered around all the aisles looking for a "treat."  I ended up buying a bottle of wine and a fage 2% yogurt with the honey thing on the side.  And then I enjoyed the hell out of it.  I slowly ate the yogurt and honey and licked off every drop that was left in the container.  Then I had a glass of wine.  It was pretty darn good.  And my stomach hurt in the morning.  Go figure.  Anyway, since then, I had some wine with a good friend, which is always worth it, really.  My stomach, again, felt nasty in the morning, but that was okay.  At the store today I bought some heavy organic half and half.  I plan to make it last.  I love my coffee black, but there's something about that half and half that turns it into something delightful.  I just have to remember to only add a little bit so my stomach doesn't have problems during the work day.  To bring it back to the point I was making in the beginning is that it makes me really savor some things I was taking for granted.  I don't have to eat this way, I choose to eat this way.  I choose to evaluate what goes into my body, the same way I would never put anything other than gas in my car.  I don't do the super expensive gas, but I certainly wouldn't ever put diesel fuel or apple juice in my Civic.  Same with me.  My beef is not always grass-fed, but it's never made by McDonald's anymore.

So back on track

My Muscles are Gonna Be Huge

Thank God for the paleo challenge I'm doing again.  And thank God Keysa is doing it with me.  I was just reading through my blog posts from 2011.  I was doing fantastic at the beginning of the year, and stayed on track until about July.  Then I started to really veer off of the healthy eating.  I wonder if it is because Tae Kwon Do was not challenging enough.  Either way I gained weight, and then started eating horribly, starting with the HalloWine at the YMCA.  Then straight through December and the end of 2011.  It's pretty awesome how quickly it happens.  2012 has again been a great start.  Crossfit has been fun, although some of the Group Elements classes have been extraordinarily boring.  I think I've mentioned that before.  It's cool though, because now we know what the hell they're talking about when they set forth the workout and I don't feel like a complete idiot.  The other day we did Cindy, I did 13 rounds.  I had a lot of modifications, but I'm okay with it.  I know that TKD allowed me to get really weak.  It's no excuse, I'm just not the type to keep up with workouts on my own.  If we didn't do pushups or cardio during a class, I certainly wasn't going to do it on my own.  So my Cindy was pretty weak, but I have something to work towards now.  At some point I'd like to be able to do a straight dead hang pullup.  Maybe even a few in a row!  I want to be strong like I used to be.  It would be a lot of fun to be able to pull myself up the pullup cage or up the rings ropes or up the regular old ropes and just fucking climb all around.  That's right, like a freaking monkey.  That's my goal for the next few months.  Sweet abs would be great while I'm at it, but being able to climb like a monkey is a-number-one priority.

Not Like This One

Like This Monkey

30 Day Challenge for Realz

Popping Poppers

Photo Shoot

I had an awesome Christmas this year, Anna and I skyped with multiple family members and got some crazy awesome gifts.  Then did a lot of relaxing over the winter break.  Saturday was New Years Eve, in case you didn't know, and that was so much fun!  We hiked 2 of the 3 peaks of Olomana, did some photography shoots and tarot card readings on the peak.  Had Teddy's Bigger Burgers for our meal after and then headed home to get all dressed up to hang out.  We headed to Joanna's where Keysa is house sitting and did lots of drinking and more photography.  Nathan set off some poppers and entertained the 5 ladies hanging out.  The doggies stayed outside and barked at fireworks going off in the distance.  They were just the right amount of drugged so they didn't go totally crazy.  I felt kind of bad, but it's better than how scared they get otherwise.  Nathan and I dropped off Anna and Ananda downtown, then picked them back up 3 hours later.  All in all it was a great end to the year.
Yesterday I woke up pretty tired and cranky and Nathan and I were snippy at each other.  Then I took a nap and felt better. But we also started our paleo whole30 challenge yesterday for real.  It's not too different for me.  Luckily I have practice not having toast when Nathan has toast and can avoid the chocolate in the fridge.  Anna does not have such practice under her belt.  I feel pretty good, although I am still pretty bloated from my December shenanigans.

Lovely Ladies

So far so good in 2012!  The plan for today is to hike Kaena Point!  Will put up some pics if we go!

I Discovered My Limit

Because Anna and I put off our Whole 30 paleo challenge until New Years, I have been eating horribly.  I have been choosing to stuff my face with anything that might possible be considered delicious.  Cookies, beer, chocolate, donuts, french fries, hamburgers, won tons, you name it.  Yesterday I woke up feeling like crap (surprise!).  I went to work and ate my breakfast a little late, my eggs with bacon.  Then probably an hour later I was bored so I ate the leftover half Kim Chee Burger from Big City Diner.  Then I ate the banana I brought.  Then I had the piece of candy that was in my lunch box.  At about 11:30 I got the reminder text that we were having a work meeting at the Golden Lion Chinese Restaurant at 12:30, which I had totally forgotten about.  So I left the school to meet my coworkers and have my second lunch.  I ate a whole bunch of Won Ton Mein.  I saved some of it for later, but ate that immediately upon my return home.  Then I had some chocolate.  And some more chocolate.

Second Lunch Eaten Here

This is how I felt

Luckily I had planned on going to Crossfit at 7pm, so that gave me a reason to stop stuffing my face.  I made some meat and rice stirfry for Nathan and then Keysa and I walked to the box.  My stomach hurt sooo bad.  I told her that I think I had reached my actual physical limit for food consumption and that any more and I might have exploded.  It effected how I worked out.  It made me slow and uncoordinated due to the discomfort.  So I decided last night that I will not be eating like that anymore.  It was truly awful.  I'm not sure exactly why I felt the need to eat so much.  It's strange. 

Another Paleo Challenge

Anna and I officially started our Whole 30 challenge yesterday.  The plan was to start on Friday, I was all set, and then got to my training at a Waikiki Beach Hotel in Waikiki.  All was going well, I ate my eggs and went to lunch with some coworkers.  Unfortunately, even though I ordered my burger with no bun, there was no getting away from all of the fried stuff.  I just texted Anna that we would start the next day instead.  To me it's a relief to be back on a "challenge."  I have poor impulse control, so when the brownies are sitting on the counter, I eat one.  Sometimes two.  And sometimes I have a difficult time stopping myself from eating way more than is socially acceptable.  With paleo I always start off wanting to snack a bunch, but I actually remember the healthy snacks that I have available.

View of Waimanalo from the Pillboxes

Yesterday started off fine, Anna made some bacon and eggs.  I went off to hike the Pillboxes with Keysa and Ananda and while I was gone she left for work.  She only took two bananas and two eggs, so I went to the store and got her some roast, some salad, cashews and coconut water.  It was nice to bring her her lunch at work.  We talked for a little bit at the bar, had some cashews,  and I headed home for my own lunch.  I'll definitely stop by there again one of these days when she's working there.  Bars are so different when they are empty during the day.  I had ahi tuna for lunch when I got home.
Dinner was steak, okinawan sweet potato and asparagus.  I am a damn good cook sometimes.  It was really tasty.  It was also a big dinner, so I didn't feel like I needed to snack on anything during the usual "dessert" time of the night.  We watched TV and made plans to run the beach and watch the sunrise.  Well, she's been working hard and hopefully she's finally having a good night's sleep.  It's 7am and she's not up yet.  Surprisingly, the sound of the dogs and I moving around out here didn't wake her up.  Hopefully she's still passed out pretty good.  There will be other mornings for sunrise beach walks.
I love this kind of morning.  I've got Gizmo on my lap, and Titus is on the couch all cozy, but keeping his eye on me.  I can hear the birds chirping outside, the usual air conditioner noise from the bedrooms and our neighbors, and the fishtank gurgling away.  Not too shabby.  I'm gonna make some coffee, then I haven't decided yet whether I will turn on the TV, read, or write in my journal.  I think I will just relax and take this day as it unfolds.

Fattening Up and Gluten Loading

So Anna and I have decided that our official date to start our Whole 30 Paleo Challenge will be December 16th.  I will get paid on the 15th, so I can start to replenish the cabinets, fridge and freezer with good for me treats.  Also on this day we shall take before pics so you can be enthralled by our transformations.  To plan I am printing up some Paleo food posters for the fridge and only buying paleo (except for Kefir and Yogurt, I need my good bacteria and can't afford the supplements) from now until the end of the challenge.  In preparation I am eating as much glutenous, sugary, processed food and beer as I can fit down my throat and into my bloated belly.
The plan this time is not to finish the whole 30 with a sugar buffet, but this time to stick with it within reason.  I plan on being super strong and fit for the Warrior Dash in March, so that is my goal.  I am hoping too that Crossfit and Paleo will help me get my knee back in shape in time to run the Great Aloha Run.
Yesterday I had the best time ever, being a part of Keysa Hale's Marathon Pit Crew.  She has been training for months to prepare to run the Honolulu Marathon and only asked that we meet her at some point to hand her some coconut water and grapes.  Instead we created an elaborate plan to meet her at mile 17, hand her the goods, and then run with her relay style until the finish.  I took the first 3 miles.  We chatted about her weekend from mile 17 to 20.  It was awesome running in the marathon.  I got to experience all of the cheering and hullabaloo without actually putting in too much effort.  I did my best to stay out of everyone's way and to enhance Keysa's marathon experience.  At mile 20 I bowed out, called the crew driving nearby and hopped into the car at a bus stop.  We kept driving and when we spotted her and her friend again, Anna jumped out and joined her.  Then Joanna, Ananda and I found them at mile 24 and Ananda and Anna finished the last two miles with her before leaving the track near the finish.  Keysa finished on her own and we celebrated with pictures, oatmeal cookies, and the pool at her hotel.  It was so much fun.  It made Anna and Ananda want to train for a marathon.  It solidified my knowledge that I do not ever want to run 26.2 miles.  I still like shorter distances.

Trial and Error

Yesterday I had a super long day.  I didn't have much time to stop and eat.  I ate with the kids in the office during their lunch time.  Then I raced over to my other school and had a couple of meetings until 4:30.  They were the kind of energy draining meetings that make me not want to work out.  Luckily Jak was at the last meeting and when I said I didn't feel like going to Tae Kwon Do she suggested walking the Lanikai Loop.  I agreed.  So I got home, had some almonds and raisins, changed and we walked the loop.  It was an okay workout, got the blood flowing, but I was just still exhausted when I got home.  I made dinner and for some reason dreamt about the chips in the fridge.  I kept feeling like I couldn't have any and it made me want them more.  Then I remembered that this challenge isn't about being super strict, it's about discovering how to make it a lifestyle.  So I stopped and thought to myself if I really wanted the chips.  I decided I did.  I had 4 chips and walked the dogs.  I really took notice of the taste of the chips and as usual, it wasn't as good as I imagined in my head.  So I stopped eating them.  They didn't really do it for me.  I think part of my problem, when super strict is that the imagined "unhealthy" food takes on this magical delicious taste and texture in my mind.  I keep thinking how wonderful it would be if I could just have a bite...   Well, mostly I know that's not true.  And when I'm not super tired I don't bother.  I have other delicious things to eat.  But when tired or under the weather, I may need to change tactics if the fantasy grows wildly.  I may need to stop and think whether or not I need to have some to stop the madness.  Last night it worked.  Monday it mostly worked, but I wasn't prepared.  I did not let the eating spiral out of control, however.  It's not that I think you shouldn't eat any snacks or carbs at all.  I know that for me, it's like crack-cocaine and I can get out of control.  I am retraining my brain to enjoy a smaller amount, in moderation.  Mostly I go without, but a planned snack is okay.

Also, I'm still deciding whether I should have a glass or two of wine tomorrow at Hallowine.  I may have a glass of wine, or my other options would be drink water all night, maybe in a fancy glass, or to have a drink like a gin and tonic.  I don't even know if that last will be available though.  What are your thoughts?  Continue to work this challenge to be about moderation?  I don't know.  I kind of like how I feel after not drinking.  Maybe I should wait until tomorrow to see how I'm feeling.  If I'm tired and stressed out I might not be able to handle just having one or two glasses, I might go totally overboard.

Day 11 of Challenge

Well, the magical quality of my challenge is long past.  The first couple of days there is usually that psyched up feeling of yeah, I'm doing something awesome!  Then there's the next couple of days where your body changes if your challenge involves any big difference in health or diet.  Then the plateau comes.  I have hit that point.  The other day I couldn't help myself and had a taste of this cake from Costco.  That was the only time I've broken form in the past 11 days.  Otherwise, I've been doing really great.  Now it's just same old, same old.  The magic is gone.  At least I don't have dreams about eating cake or cookies or milk like I used to back in January.  That was rough!  Anyone who did the original Whole 30 challenge with me in January can attest to how horrible those dreams are.  The guilt!  I don't have that anymore.  I know that if I eat something like that my life will not end.
This latest challenge, I have discovered over the last few days, is not actually about eating 100% paleo or strict anything.  It is a way for me to learn how to eat healthy and remain that way at a stable pace.  This past year I have gone from strict paleo and skinny to alcoholic binge cake eater and 140, and up and down, and up and down... and now I'm trying to even it out.  I want to learn how to eat awesome and not be an asshole.  That means that sometimes your office will have something like Boss' Day, spend a lot of money on a cake, and be offended if you don't eat some.  Usually that would result in me being an asshole and refusing any, or having a small piece, and then a bigger piece, and then a BIGGER piece and then go home and drink and snack because, what the hell, I ate bad all day anyway, didn't I?  On Monday I had a small piece of cake.  It stared at me for the rest of the day because we had a meeting in the room with the cake.  Then I had another small taste, and then... I stopped.  I went home and ate some almonds and raisins.  I made my planned steak and salad dinner.  I didn't raid the fridge for dessert, although I have some 86% chocolate in the freezer for those times that I'm feeling a little desperate.  I have maintained and I think that lesson is even more important for me this time around then losing a lot of weight because I'm eating better.  I don't want to be the yo-yo dieter.  I want to always eat awesome.  But I want to be able to have a gin and tonic or a glass of wine.  Can I have both?  I think it's probably possible.
The other thing I've noticed over the course of this challenge is that, unfortunately, it's looking like Tae Kwon Do is not enough exercise for me.  Last night I had what used to be an intense workout for me and today I'm not tired or even slightly sore.  I'm no masochist, I don't enjoy the pain post-workout, but let's be honest, I don't want to be semi-in shape.  I want to be really in shape.  I'm thinking that I am going to test for my orange belt in November, maybe test for my green belt in January.  By that time I'll definitely be done.  I might not even continue after my orange belt.  I may switch to cross fit.  I don't really want to be that guy that changes sports like they change their underwear, but the truth is I need to find the right sport that meets my standards.  It needs to be a hard, challenging workout.  It needs to keep me entertained (nothing really repetitive or boring).  I need to have some friends with me.  And I need someone (a coach) to tell me what to do.  So far I haven't found any sport that has met those standards.  I would love it if my friends wanted to do volleyball or Tae Kwon Do, or Kickboxing, but they don't.  I love Tae Kwon Do in general, but it's often not challenging enough for me and they don't compete.  Which is good, cause I don't want to get punched in the head, but at the same time, I need something to push me forward.

Crossfit and Paleo

I'm feeeling pretty freaking good this morning.  I've been going strong paleo for a full seven days and I'm past the initial "this is hard" whiny faze.  It's not really hard.  It's delicious.  My fridge and freezer are also better stocked, so I have something to shove in my face when my husband is eating vanilla ice cream.  I weighed in at 134 this morning.  Anybody who tries to count calories or tries to starve themselves to lose weight should really try this way of eating.  I am never hungry.  I have tons of energy.  And I don't feel guilty for eating too much steak and broccoli.  So that's my healthy eating challenge plan.
Yesterday morning I also tried Crossfit in Kailua.  It was an intro class and I'm sure it was only a taste of the craziness that Crossfit entails, and we were using the lightest weights, but I have a good soreness in the body.  Not too horrible, I can just tell which muscles I used yesterday more than others.
This morning Nathan and I walked the beach with the dogs, not too far, and Jak and I are going to hike Nuuanu Judd trail in 45 minutes.  Then off to Savers to buy a Halloween costume.
All in all I'm feeling pretty good.  I'll have to take another picture in the same outfit that's on the site.  My belly looks more tight already.  Eating grains and beans just makes me bloated, so when I knock them out of my diet, my stomach tightens up pretty fast.  That's worth it, even if I didn't lose any weight.
Hope everyone else is sticking to their 30 day challenge!  Myia has challenged herself not to eat any fast food, including french fries!  That's hard, but she's gonna do it and when the challenge is over she's gonna make another change towards a healthier diet.  Arin's been running like crazy and I can't wait to see her!  So stop being a pussy and do something for 30 days to make yourself healthier!  We can do it, so can you!

Da Da Duh! It has begun!

From laxcrossfit.com

Hello all, today begins my 30 day paleo/primal challenge.  I did one serious paleo challenge in January and I never felt better.  I hesitate to call it a "diet" although that technically is what it is.  However, it is simply a direction for you to turn to eat healthy.  There are no gimmicks involved like, drink this or take that and you'll drop weight.  You don't count calories, you don't starve yourself.  You don't over eat one food type.  It is a kind of healthy eating that for the most part makes complete and total common sense.  Main goal of paleo- eat lots of veggies, meats, nuts and fruits.  Don't eat processed food or sugar.  The part that is hard for people is the dairy, the legumes, the grains and the soy.  Well, and alcohol, but as much as we all love alcohol, it does make complete and total sense that not drinking will help you lose weight.  I think for me, this healthy way of eating rocks because: I love meat, I love vegetables, I love nuts, I love fruit.  I love cooking for myself, so the processed thing isn't hard.  Difficult for me: finding condiments with no added sugar.  It is fucking ridiculous what things have added sugar in them.  Like I said, I love cooking, but do I really want to have to make any sauce I add?  NO.  But there are very limited options.  Even bacon, people.  Bacon has sugar.  The grains part of the challenge is the hardest part.  Not because I can't cook without adding grains and that my meals aren't absolutely fantastic without grains, but because I really love bread.  It's the yeasty smell and the texture.  Bread has brought me down again and again this year when I'm not on a strict challenge.  The alcohol and ice cream were hard for me a couple of times, but it truly is the bread.
The breakdown in healthy eating usually goes like this for me: I have a glass of wine/beer/gin and tonic.  I drink too much of it.  I feel like a need a  piece of toast (which my brain is convinced in it's alcohol addled state is the only thing that will make my stomach feel better).  I realize I have eaten what I know to be food that makes me feel bad.  I think to myself, well I'm already going to feel like shit tomorrow, I might as well have some ice cream.  With chocolate syrup on top.  And a cookie.  And a chocolate bar.  Seriously, this is a story I've lived through many times before.  So, I'm going full strict paleo again this month.

This morning for breakfast I had 3 eggs with some coconut cream and salsa.  Delicious.  I have been drinking my coffee black since January and surprisingly, I love it that way.  Later today I'm gonna have some london broil stir fried with veggies, no need for rice or noodles.  I have almonds, baby carrots and pickled cucumbers on hand for snacking.  I am not sure what lunch will be yet, but it will either be tuna or roast beef from the deli.  I love adding salsa, coconut milk, coconut cream or eggs to everything.

The best part about this diet for me?  It truly feels like how I am meant to eat.  I feel like I am feeding myself well.  I don't feel hungry often and when I do, I just eat.  There will be times that I am busy at work and I don't get a chance to sit down for lunch and I work straight through without snacks or anything.  And I don't get that sick, low blood sugar feeling.  At some point I just start feeling hungry and I'm like, oh yeah, I should eat and I do.  I don't feel like I am starving or over full.  I don't feel deprived of all of those things that are off the list.  When you read the research- and I'll link to a few sites at the bottom where you can- it makes me feel like I'm treating my body with respect and fueling up for whatever crazy adventure is in store for me in the future.

Feel free to join me, you don't have to go paleo, although I do highly recommend it.  But there are people who do really well eating rice and gluten-free or eating oatmeal and soy.  If you are that type of person and want to join me doing a 30 day challenge of whatever healthy eating means for you, do it!  Comment here!

Links for paleo/primal that I love:
Mark Sisson- marksdailyapple.com
Robb Wolf- robbwolf.com
The Whole30, Version 4.0- http://whole9life.com/2011/06/whole-30-v4/

If I forgot any, please comment and leave the sites below.






Yikes! I posted this and realized that I'm totally going to have to do before and after pictures.  Maybe just of my belly.  I'll put the pics up later.